A small town prosecuting attorney called his first
witness to the stand in a trial - a grandmotherly,
elderly woman. He approached her and asked, "Mrs.
Jones, do you know me?"

She responded, "Why, yes, I do know you Mr.
Williams. I've known you since you were a young
boy. And frankly, you've been a big
disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your
wife, you manipulate people and talk about them
behind their backs. You think you're a rising big
shot when you haven't the brains to realize you
never will amount to anything more than a two-bit
paper pusher. Yes, I know you."

The lawyer was stunned. Not knowing what else to
do he pointed across the room and asked, "Mrs.
Williams, do you know the defense attorney?"
She again replied, "Why, yes I do. I've known
Mr. Bradley since he was a youngster, too. I used
to baby-sit him for his parents. And he, too, has
been a real disappointment to me. He's lazy,
bigoted, he has a drinking problem. The man can't
build a normal relationship with anyone and his
law practice is one of the shoddiest in the entire
state. Yes, I know him."

At this point, the judge rapped the courtroom to
silence and called both counselors to the bench.
In a very quiet voice, he said with menace, "If
either of you asks her if she knows me, you'll be
jailed for contempt!"