A New York Divorce Lawyer died and arrived at the
pearly gates. Saint Peter asks him "What have you
done to merit entrance into Heaven?"

The Lawyer thought a moment, then said, "A week
ago, I gave a quarter to a homeless person on the
street." Saint Peter asked Gabriel to check this
out in the record, and after a moment Gabriel
affirmed that this was true.

Saint Peter said, "Well , that's fine, but it's
not really quite enough to get you into Heaven."
The Lawyer said, "Wait Wait! There's more! Three
years ago I also gave a homeless person a
quarter." Saint Peter nodded to Gabriel, who
after a moment nodded back, affirming this, too,
had been verified.

Saint Peter then whispered to Gabriel, "Well,
what do you suggest we do with this fellow?"
Gabriel gave the Lawyer a sidelong glance, then
said to Saint Peter, "Let's give him back his 50
cents and tell him to go to Hell."